Sunday, September 11, 2005


Things are better today. I've been reading a book "Beyond Coincidences". Coincidences have been very significant in my life. I've had 4 Manic episodes in my life to date (I'm talking genuine mania here not hyper-mania). The single most common denominator between the 4 has been a startling upswing in the coincidences that seem to involve my life. In fact, the upswing starts before the mania and becomes so profoundly overwhelming that I am not sure if it is an effect of the mania or a cause of the mania.

That's what I mean about my involvement in "practical mysticism" when I am in my Yeehaaa! sate. The coincidences are so uncanny that they start taking on a supernatural quality, defying any kind of rational explanation. You cannot help but become convinced that someone or something is trying to communicate with you. Kind of like a telephone ringing and ringing - but you don't answer.

It might sound strange but I sincerely hope that at some future time in my life I can visit the Yeehaa! state again. Sure I don't want to get hospitalised, and I don't relish the inevitable down which hits about a month later. But there is no doubt that the manic states have been a kind of "pinnacle experience" in my life, a peek into an incredibly magical world that most souls don't even know exists.

Problem is - you can't stay in the state, it's just not sustainable. And when you come back to reality land its dull, mundane hues are soul destroying. The ideal, I suppose, would be to live somewhere on the border between "In-the-Pink" and "Yeehaa!". Just far enough to keep one foot in the Other World and one foot firmly rooted on planet earth.

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