Monday, June 23, 2008

Winter of Discontent

Posted by Keegan W.


For me the worst months for HYPO/MANIA are (N = Northern Hemisphere S = Southern Hemisphere) 73 people voted:

For me the worst months for DEPRESSION are (N = Northern Hemisphere S = Southern Hemisphere) 73 people voted:

BiPolar Guy kindly gave me access to his Polldaddy account. Above are the results of the worst months of the year for Mania and Depression. Answers were split into Northern Hemisphere and Southern Hemisphere so as to keep the seasons the same. Verdict:

Mid-winter worst for depression.

Mid-Summer worst for Mania.

So I suppose it is not surprising that everything down here in grey, rainy Cape Town is looking so bleak at the moment. I've got to take this into account when viewing all of the bad news flowing in via the media at present.

Anyway, I've created some new polls in the Polldaddy account:

At what time of day is Mania and Depression worst at (generally)?

Scroll down past the posts on this page, and you will see the new polls in grey. Please vote.


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  2. Anonymous24 June, 2008

    Hate polls, yet another way for mindless masses to find their fit in the proverbial box.

    " I fit into the box, hence I am BP " Why not just paint me pink and call me manic or paint me blue when my horrors creep out on a bad hair day.


  3. You guys vote in a pissy little poll and your whole world is shaken?? Lighten up dudes.

  4. Anonymous24 June, 2008

    LOL, that's right Keegan give them grief.

  5. Anonymous24 June, 2008

    Hmmm, considered pissed blue with pink dots as the moon is on the wane. LOL. Thank goodness the universe of the south is now officially heading to summer.


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  9. Anonymous25 June, 2008

    z0tl,; pain and suffering are all relative. A quick check on the internet reveals a max of $4.50 a gallon for gasoline. Come to the UK and pay £1.20 for a litre of petrol. ($8.98 per gallon of gasoline!!!!!!!!!!! DOUBLE THE PAIN :)

  10. willbefine, if you really want to be technical about pain and pleasure, think of this wei wu wei (doing without doing) saying:

    transcending the world of pain/suffering and pleasure/happiness isn't done by wallowing in either, but by realizing the non-existence of both.

    i never doubted living in the UK is more hell than here, i told you i spent 2 months trying to live there (aberdeen and london) in my youth when i was much more nimble than today and still couldn't stomach it.

  11. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Hey, z0tl. How 'bout you shove a pitchfork (sideways) up your ass! Maybe that would keep your mind occupied enough so you'd stop spewing your negativity. You really need to "get a life"!

    Keegan, moderate the comments to prevent z0tl from having a "stage". You/We don't need crap like that in our hemisphere. Kudos on the job your doing.

  12. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Hey anon dude, show your face so we can throw shit at it. Keegan, pls don't moderate, takes away the fun.

  13. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Hey anon dude number 2: "show your face so we can throw shit at it."

    Keegan ban this Zotl prick already. And for those who find zotl entertaining, fuck off and go read his own blog:

    (see how entertaining he can be when he doesn't have someone to throw cutting comments at every day)


  14. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    I second Ken - we've already lost BPG thanks to this miserable A-hole zotl, and I suspect we're going to lose Keegan any day too now.

    zotl is not wanted here. All those in favour of getting rid of z0tl lend your voice below.

  15. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Round of applause!!!

    F OFF zotl


  16. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    I agree

  17. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    I'm a long time reader of BPE and am sick and tired of self-appointed guru z0tl scathing ways. A lot of us are suffering from depression and we really dont need to wake up to these negative nasties every day.


  18. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    At the risk of getting my ass flamed, z0tl gives a much needed perspective. If you don;t like it don't read it.

    You guys are waaay to sensitive to diverse opinions.

    And Keegan (and Chris), please don't see this vote as against you guys. You're cool. Lets just all play in the same sandpit and respect each others' opinions.

  19. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    yall need to get high

  20. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    I did vote in the poll though :)

  21. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Everyone, take a leaf out of z0tl's book and ignore his suffering and the suffering he causes to others as neither exist.

  22. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Willbefine, you would have been absolutely correct if you had existed.

  23. Anonymous26 June, 2008

    Yo Keegan

    Won't you ask Chris about updating Pretty cool site, but you can only go through so many times :)

    He also still owes us a new book, read A Branch of Wisdom like three times now already.

  24. ROTFLOLOLO and all that at willbefine and me.

    you guys win the contest.

    anyway, keegan, go confer with bpg, quickly post a blog post that z0tl is the cause of bpg's misery and the world's depression and ban me.

    i'm used to it.

    i've been banned everywhere else.

    the internets have all banned me.

    thusly bpg has exterted his godliness and through his middle named instrument keegan, the evils of the world are now cured.

    textoid (ie, non-existent paragraph),
    z0tl van der z?tl

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  28. keegan, i love you man, i opened my heart to Christ last night and i'm passing the bong to you now.


    feel better man and lemme know when you score some E - now that shit is buddhanature if i've ever seen any 3 pounds of flax and a shitstick in my entire career as a human being.

    can't we all just get along?


  29. may i humbly recommend to you all a blog for your level of evolution?

    that enables anonymous comments.

    & does just fine not worrying over trolls, non-trolls and the existence and non-existence of either? check it out if not for the evyl ways of the z0tl commentator there then not for naught!

  30. Anonymous27 June, 2008

    Everything in moderation? Moderating z0tl, is it not a form of censorship? Pardon my liberal thinking but is censorship ever a good thing?

  31. Anonymous27 June, 2008

    This is a forum for those suffering from or living with a major mental illness. Many of us live with mind-numbing depression the likes of which would make Chinese water torture welcome.

    z0tl and his ilk are throwing kerosene on our misery. If you want debate, join the debate club. If you want support or to provide POSITIVE support, then stick around.

    Otherwise ... go back under whatever rock you crawled out from!

    Rob (the pitchfork guy)

    by the way ... do you think I'm stupid enough to provide my email address or my own blog so you can pollute those too? If so, go {bleep} yourself!

  32. Anonymous28 June, 2008

    "This is a forum for those suffering from or living with a major mental illness"

    forum: " a public meeting place for open discussion c: a medium (as a newspaper or online service) of open discussion or expression of ideas"

    I feel I now rest my case.

  33. Anonymous28 June, 2008

    Yeah, if your trying to make the case that you're an insensitive asshole!

    ass·hole - noun (vulgar, slang)

    a. a stupid, mean, or contemptible person.

    b. the worst part of a place or thing.

    Take your pick!


  34. Anonymous28 June, 2008

    wow... this forum is pushing the boundaries of insightful comments to a new level

    sarcasm: (noun) a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual (namely Rob)

  35. rob, i'll post one for you with words you can understand.

    depression leads to inaction.

    anger leads to action. stupid action in most cases.

    however, there are ways to channel anger (which is just a kind of energy, but one that unlike depression, can actually move things, not make them dissolve into nothingness).

    you believe i make light of your depression.

    i do not.

    you make the assumption that i don't know depression, that your depression is so horrendous that no one could possibly understand.

    engaging in dick measuring battles now on who's more depressed than who also won't help, but i will tell you, so you know.

    14 months of daily suicidal ideation is what i went through in 2oo4 - 2oo5.

    black marks on my neck from playing with a noose because i didn't have guts to jump from more than 150 feet high in the air on concrete or more than 300 feet above water.

    shotgun isn't a safe method either, you may end up with just a mangled face and frontal lobotomy.

    to live through i cannot live one more day, but i don't have what it takes to end it either is to truly understand despair and live in terror of the future.

    i've seen all that and based on how you talk, i will PEE ALL OVER YOU and you know why?



    and understand you can fight it.

    but not by fighting it, by enjoying it first.

    wallow in it.

    then get angry. and angrier.

    and as you do that, FIND A METHOD to channel that energy into seeing how your BODY (not your intellect) is affected by depression and how anger is building up energy IN YOUR HEAD.

    now all you need is a METHOD.

    a practical METHOD.

    to take that anger raw as it builds up in your head and send it DOWNWARD into your center of mass center of being, your belly (hara in japanese or tan'tien whatever in chinese).

    you have everything it takes to HEAL YOURSELF permanently.

    if only you stop TALKING and actually start working with your body/mind as a whole and DO IT.

    you cannot DO while depressed.

    you can DO when angry.

    at your level, the only thing you can do with anger though is attack others.

    which is a waste of anger energy.

    learn to harvest energy provided by anger to HEAL YOUR OWN BODY.

    it can be done.

    i care about bpg, i've known him for many years now on the nets.

    his intellect is his biggest enemy.

    but with love around him and understanding, he can heal himself in no time.

    but he has no one around him who knows and can show him how.

    people around him are scared, disappointed, don't understand,etc.

    and you guys who post here who think that you understand depression, you do not.

    you think you suffer from SOMETHING tangible. you do not.

    all you have is a lack of tools to deal with various energies that course through your body at various times.

    i am sorry for you all, i wish i could give you a kind word and help you, but you cannot be helped with kind words. at all.

    i am sorry.

  36. don maclean says re: vincent

    Starry, starry night
    Paint your palette blue and gray
    Look out on a summer's day
    With eyes that know the darkness in my soul
    Shadows on the hills
    Sketch the trees and the daffodils
    Catch the breeze and the winter chills
    In colors on the snowy linen land

    Now I understand what you tried to say to me
    And how you suffered for your sanity
    How you tried to set them free
    They would not listen, they did not know how
    Perhaps they'll listen now

    Starry, starry night
    Flaming flowers that brightly blaze
    Swirling clouds in violet haze
    Reflect in Vincent's eyes of china blue
    Colors changing hue
    Morning fields of amber grain
    Weathered faces lined in pain
    Are soothed beneath the artist's loving hand

    Now I understand what you tried to say to me
    And how you suffered for your sanity
    And how you tried to set them free
    They would not listen, they did not know how
    Perhaps they'll listen now

    For they could not love you
    But still your love was true
    And when no hope was left inside
    On that starry, starry night
    You took your life as lovers often do
    But I could have told you, Vincent
    This world was never meant
    For one as beautiful as you

    Starry, starry night
    Portraits hung in empty halls
    Frameless heads on nameless walls
    With eyes that watch the world and can't forget
    Like the strangers that you've met
    The ragged men in ragged clothes
    A silver thorn, a bloody rose
    Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow

    Now I think I know what you tried to say to me
    And how you suffered for your sanity
    And how you tried to set them free
    They would not listen, they're not listening still
    Perhaps they never will...

  37. i have a good friend who's fond of saying, truly listen to music and you will NEVER be alone.

    here's john lennon for you if you don't believe me:

    People say I'm crazy doing what I'm doing
    Well they give me all kinds of warnings to save me from ruin
    When I say that I'm o.k. well they look at me kind of strange
    Surely you're not happy now you no longer play the game

    People say I'm lazy dreaming my life away
    Well they give me all kinds of advice designed to enlighten me
    When I tell them that I'm doing fine watching shadows on the wall
    Don't you miss the big time boy you're no longer on the ball

    I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round
    I really love to watch them roll
    No longer riding on the merry-go-round
    I just had to let it go

    Ah, people asking questions lost in confusion
    Well I tell them there's no problem, only solutions
    Well they shake their heads and they look at me as if I've lost my mind
    I tell them there's no hurry
    I'm just sitting here doing time

    I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round
    I really love to watch them roll
    No longer riding on the merry-go-round
    I just had to let it go
    I just had to let it go
    I just had to let it go

  38. Anonymous29 June, 2008


    Follow me to "your" blog.


  39. Rob,

    I'm here for BPG, not you, now get the fuck over your self-importance and unless BPG wants to do something about my posting stop trying to act all lawyery.

    BPG doesn't need anyone else to speak for him (not Keegan, not you) and I don't give a fuck what you follow or can't follow in terms of reasoning.

    Now stick your fucking pitchfork up your ass and don't talk to me again.

    Thank you kindly.

  40. Anonymous29 June, 2008

    Look who's talking about self-importance! I wasn't speaking or attempting to defend BPG. I was put off by your sharp criticism and what appeared (to me) to be harrassment more than anything that could be remotely construed as support.

    I'll leave you to stew in your own juices. It seems to me that the very thing you've been arguing for, you now have no use for. I suspect in your world what's good for the goose isn't always good for the gander. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for, but I suspect you're not really looking for anything. I think its the fight that keeps you going. You can now have the last word.

    The Pitchfork

  41. gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha!-)

  42. Anonymous30 June, 2008

    Let us all accept that z0tl suffers no more, we just have to suffer him ;)

  43. pas du tout (excuse my french if not up to snuff), y'all here in these comments must come to grips that these are ALL comments for BPG.

    why in the first place you'd get the idea that i'm ever talking to any of YOU who happen to read this is beside my level of comprehending.

    anyway, may you all find the strength and determination to figure out no one can make you suffer but YOUR SELF.

  44. i again apologize to any and all for contributing to your delusion that i am actually inflicting some kind of pain upon you.

    the pain you experience yourself is strictly a result of your own misinterpretation of what it is i'm saying, furthermore as said before, i'm not even saying it to you.

    ALL this shit i'm doing, all the antics and theaterics and bullshit i am doing for the benefit of BPG whom i've known a very long time now and who i believe has it in him to move beyond the level where you're going up and down with the rollercoaster of life (depression/mania dichotomy).

    other than that, i do enjoy being me and KNOW willbefine in the final analysis no matter what i am.

    so, in terms of you guys knowing me on the internets AND irl, i am what you want me to be, always, i cannot be anything else for you.

    but the way you see me and know me is of your own making.

    it's not me you see, you see yourself.

    nevertheless i am, but nothing like you think you know i am.


  45. Anonymous01 July, 2008

    je suis que je suis

    as God said to Moses.

  46. I'm interested to know if the North vs South depression/mania cycles really conform to this winter/summer framework, or if depression is related to month of the year regardless of season. The common perception is that Seasonal Affective Disorder (and depression in general) and is caused by sunlight variations due to latitude and therefore should be mirrored in Northern and Southern hemisphere.

    However could these cycles could also be influenced by other factors, such as the difference in the earth's proximity to the sun at different times of the year, (Closest around January 4th and furthest (aphelion) is around July 4th). We are all familiar with the idea of 'holiday stress'. Is it experienced equally by persons in the December summer of the Southern Hemisphere?

    It is difficult to find reliable data regarding North vs South, but I'm interested in anecdotal evidence as well. Are southerners really on a mirror opposite mood cycle from northerners? Many studies on latitude and suicide statistics have produced conflicting and inconclusive data regarding the role of latitude, sunlight and mood disorders.

    A comparison of mood-cycles of north vs south by month (jan, july) with data from summer/winter would be interesting evidence for the mechanism behind seasonality being tied to sunlight changes or another possible cause.

    More on this subject can be found on my blog:

    BTW my interest is not only academic; I have suffered with the symptoms of BP-II for over 30 years. I began to notice a strong seasonal pattern by my early 20s and it has followed regular pattern of winter depression and spring remission since. I have been stabilized by medication, but the yearly cycles continue albeit with varying intensity.


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