Sunday, March 19, 2006

The Path

I haven't posted a photo for a while, probably because everything around me has been looking so shit this last week. But the clouds started lifting yesterday and on our lounge wall I spotted this shadow of a ornamentive candle holder.

Did some kite flying yesterday too. I'm working on a new trick - lying on my back in the beach sand and hooking the strings onto my feet (which are sticking out in the air) and flying the kite with my leg movements. I got it right for a couple minutes but it's not easy. Will be working on this one. Mrs M reckons I must look like a total lunatic lying on the beach with my legs in the air. Well, shite, she's not far wrong!

Meditation has helped me so much this week that I'm beginning to reconsider my Buddhist standpoint. I don't like boxing myself into any dogmatic set of prescribed rules, but these dudes are really onto something. And if someone has already spent 2 500 years developing a software program that works for you, why try develop your own program from scratch? That's kinda like saying "I'm not going to be boxed in by Microsoft's dogmas and dictates, so rather than use Excel (which I use every day) I'm gonna design my own spreadsheet program from the bottom up." Ludicrous right? OK so you can add little customised tweaks to Excel to suit yourself. Your own Macros and templates. And apply it to work out your own set of problems. Is Buddhism any different? Rather stand on the shoulders of giants than get crushed underfoot by them.

Besides, it is plainly evident that my own software is not working. It's full of damn bugs and worms.

The first time I seriously encountered Buddhism was in 2001 when I attended 2 Buddhist meditation retreats in the Natal midlands. An introductory one of 2 days and a hardcore Silent Retreat of 10 days. They both had a huge impact on me. I remember taking the 2 hour drive home after the first one. I drove at about 30 miles an hour the whole way home. Cars sat on my tail, cursed, hooted, but I just smiled at them. I was in another world; on another time dimension.

For a full year thereafter I meditated every day for half an hour. But I never considered myself a true Buddhist. And then Buddhism kind of drifted out of my life. Can't remember why. That's how it is with us BiPolars - things just come and go. The cosmic Merry-go-Round (although it's not always Merry). A year ago I was a commited Gnostic.

I guess what I am saying is: don't be surprised if BP Guy starts wandering down the Buddhist Path again for a while. It's about the only thing working for me at the mo. Whether I stick to the path or not, I don't know. Likely not, based on past experience. What does it matter anyway? All Paths lead to Roam.


  1. that's interesting that you posted the whole..i guess it would be considered an analogy - with the software/spiritual path.. i consider myself 1/3 buddhist, 1/3 hindu and 1/3 pagan. subscribing to one set of beliefs just didn't work for me.. so i created "genism" - and that works just fine.

    i've always wanted to do a silent retreat and actually thought about loooking into one for sometime this year. you should tell more about that!

  2. I like the image. As for the Buddhist thing, I'm living here in South Korea where every beautiful mountain temple is located by a swastika on the map and the monks in Seoul have been known to riot on occasion. I dig the all-gray robes, but the shaved heads unfortunately take me back to my teen years in Toronto. I once met an Israeli who discovered that studying Buddhism here was a great way to keep out of the army. But if it works for you...

  3. you know on the kite flying image? I figure you are doing a public service , while amusing and enjoying yourself you are also putting a smile on the face of anyone who passes by and taking their minds off whatever might be wrong in their world for a minute. Now what is wrong with that??? LOLOL

  4. That's how it is with us BiPolars - things just come and go. The cosmic Merry-go-Round (although it's not always Merry).

    You said it perfectly. I am so damn confused spiritually, but Buddhism seemed to take the lead for me. Just need to put one foot in front of the other and get my ass back to temple.


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